Wednesday, October 20, 2010

God Knows

Today I've been thinking about the sovereignty of God, and how He always has a plan. I can see evidences of His plan in my life more clearly this year than I have before. For example, when God told me to give up theater, I obeyed, despite my own private misgivings. I can honestly say that it is one of the best decisions I've made. I have way more time to do the important things, such as sleeping and doing homework, and even just hanging out with my roommates. I have time now to attend Vespers and Kingdom Mobilizers. And my heart isn't burdened by the competition, by the constant threat to my self-image. Although I sometimes miss it, it is freeing to know that I don't have to put everything else aside for theater. Instead, I put theater aside for everything else. Now I can support my friends in the theater department with no envy because they are more successful in that area than I. I am free to congratulate them whole-heartedly.

Another area is that of Women's Chorale. Last year I had a terrible attitude, therefore I had a terrible experience. I had wanted so badly to be in Concert Choir that I let my disappointment take over my life. This year, when I tried out again and didn't make it into Concert Choir, I decided to come at it with a new attitude. And God has blessed that so much. He gave me a leadership position in Women's Chorale, an opportunity to be an example. He helped me break out of my comfort zone and begin getting to know the other girls. He broke down my previously conceived notions about others and about myself. And if I had gotten into Concert Choir, I wouldn't have experienced this growth. He knew exactly what experience I needed to get me where I am today. And I can honestly say that I'm happier now than I've been before.

Sometimes I know that Jeremiah 29:11 can seem so cliche. But it is so true. God knows the plans He has for us. He isn't blindly making mistakes and then saying "Oops, how can I cover this up?" No. He is intentional. He doesn't cause the bad stuff, but He allows it to happen. He allows us to fall. Why? The Christian Bale version of Batman asks the question "Why do we fall?" That movie answers, "So we can learn to pick ourselves up." I disagree. Why do we fall? So we can learn to let God pick us up. You may not know why something has happened in your life. There is stuff going on in my life and I don't know why. But I know that God has a plan. In the moment, it is hard to see that plan. But I can look back on my life and see evidence of His plan, His timing. I bet if you look, you will also be able to see the evidence.

Brothers and Sisters, we must learn to let God pick us up. So, I leave you with the familiar, cliche, but so true verse-

Jeremiah 29:11 I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to help you, not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.


1 comment:

  1. thank you. and thank you for being real about the fact that the Bible verse is cliche and so very real at the very same time. thank you for sharing your thoughts and your growings. it's a beautiful journey though painful.